Stop Comparing Yourself to Others

     When I was younger, around the age of 18, I caught myself constantly comparing my life to other people's. I was focused on how they looked, what grades they got, or how put-together they seemed. Social media made it even worse. It felt like everyone else had everything figured out, while I felt clueless and had no idea what I was doing. The comparison I struggled with the most was about my plans for life after high school. Some of my friends were committed to a college and they made it seem like that was the only option after high school. I did plan to go to college, but at the time I was unsure of the whole process. I didn't know what my major would be, I didn't know what college I would go to, I wasn't sure if it was really what I wanted, and I didn't know if it would be affordable for me. I almost felt peer-pressured in a way because I wanted to be like my friends and other kids my age. 

    But one day, I realized how draining that mindset was. Comparing myself to others didn't motivate me. It made me feel bad about myself in some instances. It felt like I was making decisions that weren't true to me and what I actually wanted. So every day I started reminding myself that everyone moves at their own pace. I reminded myself that everyone is a little bit different. Other people have different support systems, financial situations, and life circumstances. I reminded myself that I can make it work at my own pace. Over time, I shifted my attention away from everyone else’s achievements and concentrated on my own growth.

    When I was finally able to focus only on myself, I decided that I wasn't ready for college right after high school and that I would work to save up money instead. In doing so, I finally figured out what I wanted to do with my career and life. I decided that I wanted to be a Physical Education Teacher and that is what I am currently pursuing at Slippery Rock University. One and a half years after high school, I finally decided to go to college to obtain a Bachelor's degree. My classmates were halfway done with their programs, but I didn't let it faze me at all. I kept on showing up for only myself and didn't let any outside influence get to me.

    Here I am a few years later as a Junior in college, and all my friends who graduated high school with me have also graduated from their colleges. It was hard not to compare myself to them, but I am very grateful for the path I took. I am glad I went at my own pace and not like everyone else around me. It allowed me to enjoy and experience different things. Everyone has their own timing. I still believe I wasn't ready at the same time they were for college. Some people hit their goals faster than others, but that doesn't mean that I am behind at all. Life is not a race, it is a personal journey. And I try to live by that day to day. The more I accepted that, the more confident and grounded I started to feel. 

    One of my favorite quotes of all time is, "comparison is the thief of joy." I still struggle with comparing myself to others, I will never be perfect. But when I do find myself in the dumps or comparing to others, I sometimes think of this quote. Focusing on what you don't have makes you overlook what you have already accomplished in your life.

    I wanted to write this blog to maybe relate to other people who experienced something similar. Focus on yourself, celebrate the small victories, and go at your own pace. Letting go of comparison hasn't made me perfect by any means, but it has made me peaceful. I have learned how to appreciate who I am, where I am, and the progress I have made.

Try your best to stop comparing yourself to others. You are your own person and don't need to be like anyone else. 

Be happy with yourself. Celebrate yourself. Be kind to yourself.

You are loved and needed just the way you are.  :)